Summer's Freedom

I'm excited for summer.

I have an open canvas to paint on now. 

The pressure's off, and I'm free within me.  

I'll work super hard, like I do just about every summer, but what will be great is what I'll be able to do with my spare time.  And what makes this year a whole lot different than years past is an adjustment of my scope.  

In the past years, I felt like I should be partying, even though that wasn't my personality. It was conflicting, and not harmonious to my soul.  Why am I enjoying sitting on my balcony or standing alongside the ocean when I should be enjoying the longer days and the pool parties, or the afternoons at the Lake, or rooftop parties in the city?  These things are great, and I can do them sometimes, but it's still not exactly my lifestyle.  So this summer instead, I'll probably be taking my camera out a lot more, meeting a friend or two for Sunday afternoon lunches under the breezy Bay Area air,  or sitting on my balcony on weekday afternoons with a book in hand; those days when I don't have to go too far to enjoy the sun and the breeze.  

This has been the first summer in awhile where I'll feel totally comfortable in my skin; and in my likes and dislikes.  I don't have to be cool, and I can do my nerdy shit.  I know that sounds like something I should have learned in the 6th grade, but it's hard to not want to be a part of the cool crowd; even harder when my personality doesn't fit it.  Then, you accept it, and it becomes so so easy.  So yeah, it took awhile.  Today though, I'm here, present, fully, and it's nice. 

So I'm excited for summer, and I'm excited for the chance to make much better use of my free time, being out there enjoying my life, and enjoying my home.